A Mess of words
by His Singer1
Summary: Half written stories and Drabbles
1. Chapter 1

He stares in the mirror at his reflection noting the lines around his eyes, it was only slightly noticeable but still they were there. he rubbed his eyes once before straightening his tie and tuxedo, he was perfect he knew that but it was only on the outside and on the inside he was a bundle of nerves and he was in inner turmoil.

He felt wrong being here and truthfully he didn't want to be here, he wasn't ready to face today or anyone at all. he tried to fight it but Esme was persistent and she really wanted him to come, he had to come after that. he was doing this for Esme and for Rosalie even after everything that happened he would do anything for her.

He turned from the mirror and took to pacing the room and glancing at the clock, in about ten minutes he would be facing his past and present. he would stand in the grand hall and watch two unions meet while he pretended he was okay. he would endure the whispers from both sides and accusations. he would endure the hate thrown his way and endure his own pain.

He would this for her and Esme because he owed it to them, he would do this for anyone but himself whether it was the wrong or right thing to do. he wouldn't apologize because in his mind he did no wrong , in his mind he was the victim and he would not feel guilty at all.

The door opened and Esme walked in with tears in her eyes, she said nothing but pulled him in for a hug and held on tightly. he allowed it hugging her back, this is one thing he missed and the only thing he missed. she pulled back and wiped her eyes taking a deep breath.

"I'm so happy you could come, i wasn't sure you would and afterwards i felt bad for making you come to endure this but i had to. i had to bring my family together again" she said tearfully.

He sighed he was angry and hurt at first, he didn't think she took his feelings into consideration but he missed his family and he always wanted to make his mother happy. although the main reason he was here was because she asked him to, he was surprised when he got in the invitation but he was glad.

"i know mom but don't get your hopes up, there will not be any reconciliation" he said firmly.

Her eyes flashed and she frowned " Edward this can't go on any longer, its hurting this family it won't take much for you to apologize and mean it, he might not accept it right away but give him time" she pleaded softly.

"For the last time please drop it, it won't happen anytime soon" he said.

She watched him for a moment and he shifted under her gaze, he heated when she watched him like she was judging him. she had a way to make him feel small and feel chastised but not this time.

"i guess i did get my hopes up, i'm not angry just disappointed" she said finally.

She kissed him once on the forehead and left the room leaving him standing still frozen and a feeling of unsettlement in his gut. it would be better for her to be angry because he could take her anger but her disappointment was much worse.

He was still frozen from the unexpected kiss, she knew how he felt about touch and any other emotion. he still didn't feel right accepting kisses from her, not like when his mother did it. he shook away the feeling of sadness at the thought of his mother before walking out the room.

People were filing into the grand hall and he followed the crowd, he was on the lookout in case he was caught by surprise. he still wasn't ready to see any of them but he spotted Carlisle and made his way forward. Carlisle didn't change at all except for wisps of grey in his hair, he smiled warmly when he came near.

"Its good to see you son" He said pulling him in for a hug.

He was getting used to Carlisle calling him son but he thought it was time for change and he allowed it.

"You too" he replied.

there was an awkward silence before Carlisle broke it.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

He looked him in the eye, he knew how he felt betrayed and hurt. he knew he didn't approve of this day.

"How are you?" he answered ignoring his question.

Carlisle smiled " Happy to see my family together again no matter the circumstances but somewhat nervous at how it will turn out" he said honestly.

"I'll be on my best behavior" he said teasingly.

They stood aside and watched people file in the hall, there were many stares and whispers as they passed him but he ignored it. some recognized him and the women smiled at him, he ignored the attention his eyes looking for someone else.

When he saw Emmett enter the hall he knew the time was near, a few minutes later the music started and Rosalie came into view holding onto her fathers arm. she was surprised to see him and gave him a small smile, she was still a sight to see with her long golden hair and bright blue eyes. she was wearing a knee light gown that accentuated her curves, he swallowed his eyes roaming all over. she still had an effect on him.

she spared him one more glance before she kept walking on, he was hurt he thought she would have stopped to talk to him at least. she only had eyes for Emmett and he was smiling widely but when he caught sight of Edward his smile faded and he looked angry.

He thought he could handle this, he thought he could be happy for her but he couldn't. this could have been them but Emmett ruined it. they had reached each other looking happy in love and he felt like he would be sick. he took one look at Carlisle who nodded before sprinting from the hall never looking back.

* * *

 **So it's been a while, still in a writing slump but i want to try and write something. I've found this in my documents and wanted to try something. I'm going to post some half written stories and i want you guys to tell me which i should finish.**

 **Thanks so much**


	2. Chapter 2

**Kindness; a quality or state of being kind.**

i stare at the computer screen until the words blur together my head pounding mercilessly. Drinking to take away the pain was good in hindsight but never ended well, i open the drawer at my desk taking out a bottle of excedrin and popping two. it should hold me until the afternoon meeting i needed to be up for and extremely focused.

This would be a good opportunity for the company to expand especially over seas, so much was riding on this meeting and failure was not an option. i turned my attention back to the computer staring at the blinking email icon, it was taunting me making my fingers itch to click it but my heart and mind are not ready. i already know the name of the sender and my anger and stubbornness is keeping me in check.

i swivel in my chair looking around my office space checking out the souvenirs from my many trips around the world. Its not empty but its not filled and thats just the way i like it, the quiet of the office unnerves me so i power on the radio and turn the volume on full nodding my head to the beat.

i double check the itinerary for the week and approve the design for a new logo before deciding a short nap is in order before the meeting. i move from my chair and over to the leather couch to lay down but not before buzzing my assitant to let her know not to bother me.

"Lauren hold off everything until 1:00" i buzz on the intercom.

" your noon appointment will be here shortly, should i hold that too?" She buzzes back.

"I Did say hold everything" i reply irritated.

"Just one more thing sir" she replies.

i grimace a small pounding in my head warning me to keep it cool but my headache is coming back in force and i'm tired and pissed off to no avail.

"This better be important" i snap back.

" you do remember you have two more fill ins coming in today"

and" i say losing patience.

she sighs " it coincides with your meeting sir" she says slowly.

Normally i would care but today is not boding my well and my headache is making it worse, i expect no less from my employees and i'm usually fair to them when my temper is low but not today and not now.

"Then reschedule the fucking appointment and don't bother me unless i page you are we clear?" i hiss back.

"Yes" she whispers.

i click off the intercom and lie down hoping for a dreamless sleep.

 _The flames spread quickly and the heat burns him as he moves away against the wall, his breathing fast and panicking as the flames get hotter and smoke fills the space. He hears screaming on the other side and he scrambles in the direction of the voice. as he moves he hears the house fall aparts and the pieces fall in front of him, he ducks and crawls feeling the flames reach him. they touch his skin and the pain is unbearable, he screams and screams not remembering what to do in his panic and the other voice screams back._

" _Edward!" a deeper voice calls this time._

 _He tried to speak but the smoke invaded his mouth and senses._

" _Where are you baby!?" a softer voice calls._

 _This voice he would do anything for so he crawls to the direction her voice is coming from and hes almost there. he can see her red dress blending in with the flames and the legs of his father. he crawls over and clings to her crying from pain and relief, she stares at him in horror and immediately grabs a sheet and puts the fire out._

 _Mother, Father , and Son Huddle in the corner trying to keep the flames at bay, the heat is unbearable now and the father wishes he had time to get the sprinklers fixed. the mother looks at her husband cradling her son's head and they communicate wordlessly._

 _Just as they stand the fire roars and leaps up higher and higher, they stare in horror before moving back but they have no where to go and the flames lick at their skin and clothes. the smoke blurs their vision and chokes them. just when they think they are doomed they hear the sound of help, the fire alarm and the mother cries tears of relief._

 _They break through the house turning on the hose and dousing the house with water, they can see the roof about to cave in and move quickly. they see the red dress and call out to them to hold on. they are badly hurt and the mother and father know they won't make it, they look at their son and the path the help cleared and makes a decision._

 _The roof cracks and time is running out, they put their son down and push him towards the path as the help hold out their arms. he won't budge clinging to his mother and crying loudly._

" _Its okay baby go!" the mother calls and gives him one last push._

 _The fire-fighter catches him and looks back to the parents as the roof finally falls and swallows them whole. the fire is fiercer now grabbing the boy and the firemen as they move quickly through the house. there is no where to go but the window, they sit the boy down as they break the window and jump through._

 _Its just one fireman left and the boy, just as he bras the boy the fire catches up to them and hes jumping through the window. the fall is terrifying and the boy is screaming from terror and pain. just before they reach the ground darkness takes him._

* * *

i wake up shaking and sweating as knocking starts at the door, i calm down my breathing before sitting up just as the door bangs open. a tall lean woman in heels and a crisp suit walks in, she strides in on long legs exuding confidence.

"Edward" she calls concerned at his state.

He sits up " I'm fine vicky" he assures her.

Shes unconvinced but nods anyway before pulling the door wide open " you have a meeting and you'll be late in ten seconds" she says quickly.

I make it with two seconds to spare and rightfully so, it seems they would have started without me. i sit at the table next to michael and he passes me the folder with a small nod before turning to the front.

Benjamin smiles at me before clearing his throat signaling the start of the meeting.

" i would like to welcome you personally and say as senior partner who has been here for years i never thought we would get this far and it is my firm hope that we won't stop here" he finishes before sitting down.

The applause dies down when Tyler begins to speak, he's beginning to look more fragile and its my firm wish when he steps down that he will let me take over.

"Crowley and Company is relatively a small company and its a big risk to expand it so far but thanks to Edward i see the benefits" he says.

i nod and begin my long speech " i've put together a few key points for show and the expectations of this company" i say nodding to the folders in front of everyone.

"We can take this past physical representation and open a whole new venue, from image to actual places for example the law firm next door and i'm positive we can take the volturi company to a whole new level" i finish and sit calmly.

The volturi brothers aro and felix are discussing in small voices and their faces look so serious, there is a reason to be nervous but when i see tyler smile at me i know i had done well.

The minutes tick by slowly and everyone is on edge, if we get this deal we will be on our way to a bigger enterprise. the volturi brothers are a big european company and very famous, they handle big names in the industry and if we connect with them the possibilities are endless. i have other worries like find a new assistant and the CEO position, i know Michael wants it but only because he thinks he is entitled because hes the boss's nephew.

i worked hard to get where i am in this position, i'm right behind Ben and if we get this deal the CEO position is in the palm of my hand.

Finally the moment is here as the volturi brothers pull apart, aro slowly smiles and turns to Tyler.

"Where do we sign?" he asks in his thick accent.

The meeting is over and i can rest until tomorrow, i think about going out again but decide not to. when i land CEO then i'll celebrate until now i'm focusing on other issues. i pass Victoria on the way to my office chatting with lauren, she follows me and sits on my desk making herself comfortable.

"So i hear congratulations are in order" she sings with glee.

i smile " Not yet, we haven't made CEO yet"

She scoffs " Trust me that's a done deal"

"We'll see" i reply turning back to my computer.

She comes over and sits in my lap making me shift and groan, she wiggles a bit before settling down.

"What do you say we celebrate at my place tonight" she practically purrs tracing my lips with her finger.

i shiver feeling myself grow hard at the thought, it would take my mind off things but surprisingly i'm not feeling it tonight.

"Next time" i whisper in her ear.

she nods before grabbing my face roughly and kissing me, its aggressive and filled with need. she pulls my hair and bites my lips, her tongue begs for entrance but i kiss her once more before pulling away.

she stands up breathing heavily and straighten her clothes walking toward the door " Don't worry about finding a new assistant i have that covered" she says.

"Thanks vicky i appreciate it" i say sincerely.

i mean it shes been a good friend to me ever since i moved to the city and she would have loved to claim me if i wanted her to, we have a simple friendship( sexual of course) and it works for us. i would have never agreed to it if i didn't think i could handle it or she couldn't, this way neither of us gets hurt. shes not looking for commitment and i'm not looking for any of it, i'm better on my own not getting attached.

You get attached and you end up hurt, i only ever loved one woman before i lost her horribly and i won't go through that again.

"You can repay me tomorrow" she says winking before closing the door.

i arrive home at six in the evening with a lot on my mind, i finally opened one email from Rosalie and regretted it. it was pictures from the wedding with a note that said wish you were here. the happiness radiating from the pictures enrage me, they say time heals all wounds but for me it seemed useless.


	3. Chapter 3

**After**

"What is it you remember most about him?" She peered intently at me.

I smiled. " his smile... It drew you in the moment you meet him" I answered

She nodded "tell me what makes his smile so special"

I laughed " I never said it was special... it's just the first image I remember"

She smiled. " so what makes this particular image ..special?"

I smirked . Now she's asking the right questions

I pause... Savoring the details in my head... they come rushing back slowly but surely. It was hot that day and not the normal heat,I was sweating in all the right and wrong places. I told myself to suck it up and wait...just wait and you will be rewarded. this was not my usual scene..outside with so many people and loud noises. this part of town was always so busy and full and always happening. I preferred the background silently observing as I blend in but today wasn't the same, today i wanted to seek out people... one person in particular.

He was late and i was becoming antsy.. I felt out of place among everyone at the coffee shop, it was the small type not popular but known and i heard they make great coffee and that he came here everyday scoping , searching for his next prey but as i said today is different. I'm on the hunt and he has become the thing he so desperately sought.

" Because... It was his smile that led me down this path...sincere yet fake underneath" i spoke slowly.

She was confused " Explain please"

"All i wanted... was one peek to see.. To find out what made him so special... What made people want no.. need to be near him... love him and why did they stay after finding out it was all a lie"

She shook her head " i think i understand... this wasn't about revenge.."

I sighed " it was in a way... See i needed evidence... i needed to put a face to the name... to the pain he caused and then i could give him back the pain he so eagerly"

Pain. pain. Pain. pain... What ever could you gain?

She sighs loudly " you are being contradictory and lying to yourself... You sought him out for one reason alone... You wanted to hurt him,,,"

I cut her off " No, i know what i said... there are all kinds of pain. I sought him out to exact physical pain and found something better"

I felt ridiculous sitting here alone and pretending to like coffee when i could be home.. Away from all of this mind numbing babble. I stood ready to walk out and find another way to play out my plans when i felt roaming eyes everywhere...it made my skin crawl. I looked up and there _he_ was... The way he was appraising me made me uncomfortable and i wanted to march over and wipe that smile off his face.

I was frustrated... He looked average... Just average... everything..his build his looks his hair, the only thing that stood out was the way he dressed... Showy and flashy and his smile.. The one he flashed at every conquest that made them warm... it made me angry. His smile spoke volumes... it was very telling. He smiled like he knew... he knew he was attractive... he knew he caught your attention... it was confident yet fake at the same time. He didn't mean it, he smiled with his lips and face but never his eyes, his eyes looked everywhere but your face.

" I would have walked away but that smile that just knew he had me... just knew what he was getting" i laugh humorously.

She leans forward in her seat in anticipation " what did you do?" she asked. And at the same time it felt accusatory.

I smiled " I walked over and...slapped him "

" i felt offended by his smile by his stare... He was practically undressing me with his eyes, it was too sexual too disrespectful and he needed to know it wasn't acceptable... He needed to know that there was one person who wasn't fooled by him... one girl he couldn't have"

She sits up in her seat smiling knowingly " and what he couldn't have... he wanted even more.. " she says laughing.

" and so began the chase and so began my plan.. So simple and easy" I Trail off.

The smile quickly leaves her face and it becomes dark.. Haunted " what changed... what made you wrathful..." she says softly.

 _WHAT MADE ME KILL HIM?_

I sit up and look her in the eye " He broke my heart" i reply simply.

Yet Every word is cold and sharper than knives carving out a spot where my heart should be.


	4. Chapter 4

**Before**

* * *

Isabelle

I could walk forever never knowing where i was going... Where i would end up and that would make walking bearable, with each step i could clear my head of every negative thought. I wouldn't think about the pain that's building and building or the anger that's creeping in slowly mixing with sadness all consuming. I would just walk and walk till i reached the end of the road and whatever waited at the end of the road.

Except i didn't think this through... the sky become dark and the temperature dropped and the wind whooshed by in alarming rates, i became cold instantly but i pushed through. The cold gave me something else to think about and as the world and city went by in a blur, i didn't even feel the cold anymore.

There was trees up ahead, tall and short trees all bending to make an opening, i walked off the concrete stepping onto grass and into the opening in the trees and i walked a little faster.. Faster.. Faster.. Even faster until i was running and running then sprinting. My feet pounded the grass ,my breath came in breathy gasps until i could no longer breathe. I dropped to my knees needing to catch my breath but i sat there i didn't have the strength to get back up.

I wanted to stay here until the pain and memories passed and tomorrow would be the beginning of a new year and then i would get on the plane and flying off to a new life.. New adventure. Yes i think i will take that internship.. Travelling all around the world.. Learning new languages and learning the art of business from many empires.

Yes. I think. I should get back up but i just want to lay down and get reprieve from the whirlwind of today.

Love wasn't meant to be a weapon . Love was never meant to be the enemy slowly creeping on my soul.


End file.
